Wow, today I won the Nobel Peace prize. Obviously, the Nobel Selection Committee is in awe of me.
Apparently, some Americans are in shock.
As soon as I heard I won, I logged into Twitter to witness the rejoicing in real time. And then the tweets started rolling in. Expressions of shock in 140 characters or less.
My favorite tweet: "He hasn't even done anything yet". YET! I love that. See, the expectation is there even among the non-believers. And for that, I win!
So go ahead America and be shocked. It's OK. I'm sure I deserved to win the Nobel Peace Prize; I must have. Why else would they have given it to me?